Shepa Learning’s Survival Guide for Business Networking Solo
Who hasn’t walked into a room full of strangers at a business networking event thinking…
- Who will I talk to?
- Will I end up as the proverbial wallflower?
- What’s the minimum amount of time I have to spend at the event before I can slip away?
- Why did I think this was a good idea in the first place?
Here are seven great tips to take the ‘big sweat’ out of walking into a business networking situation solo:
1. Don’t be too invested in the outcome
Many of us think that every interaction has to be a slam dunk. It doesn’t. So don’t put unnecessary pressure on yourself. Make a decision when you go to an event solo to treat it as an experiment. That removes the emotion from the situation.
2. Remember most people feel the same way as you
When you stare at that crush of people, yes, it may seem that they are all extroverts, having a great time but that’s not so. We have been teaching the skills of networking for over two decades and we often poll our audiences and ask “who really likes networking?” Only a scattering of hands will reluctantly rise. Our advice is to walk into that room thinking that you can make someone else feel better about being at a networking event. It’s kind of empowering!
3. Remember our mutual pluralistic ignorance
That is a big fancy term from behavioral scientists such as Nicholas Epley and Juliana Schroeder, who found that “Everyone is willing to talk but thinks everyone else is unwilling.” We are social animals, so as a solo networker it’s important to remember that most people want to strike up a conversation, even though they don’t start one.
4. Give yourself permission to talk to people you don’t know
Yes that seems obvious, but as Stephen Covey famously said, “common sense is not always common practice”. People often hold back (see pluralistic ignorance above) and wait for someone to approach them to start a conversation. This is not a good idea as a solo networker. Give yourself a pep talk as you walk to the event, tell yourself you have permission to talk to people you don’t know. And remember, a wallflower is a good person to approach because they want what you want—a conversation!
5. Make it easier by arriving at the best time
It can be rather intimidating to arrive at a business networking event once most attendees have shown up. People are already knee-deep in conversation and the decibel level is up around 100 (about the same as a room full of garbage disposals all switched on). This makes networking solo even more challenging, so plan to arrive early. What do we mean by early? For example, if there is a reception prior to an event and the reception starts at 5 p.m., arrive around 5:15 or 5:30 p.m. There will be fewer people, which makes it easier for you to gravitate to those individuals. And because it is not as noisy, you can actually have a relaxed conversation.
6. Check your facial expression smile
Your spaniel may have a sad resting face, but you don’t want one. Have a pleasant look, imagine saying the word “e”. Make eye contact with people and smile—this makes you more approachable.
7. Relax and try to not work too hard
People put a lot of pressure on themselves. Forget about Casablanca and these interactions being the “beginning of a beautiful friendship.” Also, every conversation doesn’t require a follow-up. Sometimes it’s OK to be a “catch and release” networker. Simply enjoy the people you meet. That way, you’ll do it again, solo!
If you didn’t read our tip on Look for the odd numbers when walking into a room solo here it is.
Wrapping it up
We hope these tips will help you navigate your next business networking event solo.
If there are other areas of face-to-face (and virtual) business networking you want to improve take a look at our Power of Positive Networking® online course. You can do the course at your own pace, on your computer or on your phone. Better networking skills, guaranteed!
Gayle Hallgren and Judy Thomson
Photo at top: istock.com/ Caiaimage/Martin Barraud
Please note: As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases.